During the month of October in 2016 we were blessed by the gift of adoption. Our son was born and placed in our arms by the most loving, brave, selfless woman. This is his birth mother who we love and will always love so much.
A question that I often get asked, "I am considering adoption. Where do I start?"
PUT ASIDE ANYTHING NEGATIVE THAT YOU HAVE HEARD "Adoption cost so much money!" "My friend adopted. The process took them 7 years!" "Billy's neighbor was trying to adopt but the child went back to their birth family." "It must be so hard to bond with a child that you did not birth." "Only older kids, sibling groups and children with disabilities are able to be adopted."
DO YOUR OWN RESEARCH There are a number of different programs that you can use and which one you choose will depend on your families preferences. We chose the Domestic Infant Adoption Program because our hearts felt called to adopt an infant from the U.S. From there we explored what organizations offered this type of program in our area. This required a lot of community outreach. We did everything from Google searches to seeking out other families in our community that have adopted. We started learning the pros and cons to using adoption consultants, adoption agencies, state adoption services, etc. We went to information meetings, read reviews and asked any questions that came to mind. I would strongly encourage you to do the same. Ultimately your hearts will lead your family to the best fit. For us, we ultimately chose an adoption agency.
NOW WE KNOW BUT HOW WILL IT BE POSSIBLE? You've decided on a program and you cannot wait to get started! Your anxious to get going but pressed with anxiety at the same time because the fee schedule along with the home-study requirements are staring back at you in the face. I have news for you. You are not on a timeline and as long as you keep pushing forward it will happen. You will eventually be an active family waiting for your precious little one to be placed in your arms. Try not to look at everything as one lump sum. The to do list and the fee schedule that is. Break it down and tackle it little by little. This is a journey up hill. I have a lot of friends who have done fundraising for their family's adoption. What people often find out once they start sharing their journey is that their friends and family want to support them. I have seen t-shirt, Etsy shop, puzzle piece, garage and bake sale fundraisers. Many adoption grants are available too!
BONDING AFTER PLACEMENT Love makes any family one unit and love is what builds togetherness, a worthwhile adventure. I have been my sons mother ever since the moment he was placed in my arms. My husband has been his father just the same. We are his parents and he is our son. We were in love with him before we ever met him. Our relationship has always been so natural. All we have needed and continue to need is unconditional love.
Most of all find joy in the start of the journey! It's easy to get caught up in the cost and hoops you have to jump through. You can easily lose focus on why you're on this adventure.
Are you CONSIDERING ADOPTION? IN THE PROCESS? have you adopted before? say, "hello!" drop a question or comment below!